Shooting Stars Wrestling #9

The show starts off backstage where we see a huge pull-apart already in progress.  On one side is John Cena and on the other is the entire Hart Foundation.  Jimmy Hart is in the back of the group, blasting away on his megaphone.  Cena says that he wants Owen in the ring tonight, but Owen says that he is not due to defend his title yet.  Cena says that he will take on anyone in the Hart Foundation tonight, but Owen says if he wants them it will have to be in a tag match.  Owen says that he can’t get along with anyone, even his partner last week.  Cena says that he doesn’t need a partner, but if Shane McMahon says that he has to have one he will take the next person that walks through the door to be his partner.  In walks CM Punk!!!!  Punk laughs and says ‘Howdy . . . partner,’ as Owen and the Hart Foundation start laughing at Cena.



The SHOOTING STARS WRESTLING promo airs to ‘New Shit’ by Marilyn Manson


MIKE – ‘Hello wrestling fans, and welcome to another addition of Shooting . . . Stars . . . Wrestling!  You saw it at the top of the program folks, what a wild development backstage!’

JOE – ‘Are you kidding me????  Cena and Punk are going to be partners again tonight????’

MIKE – ‘It is obvious that neither of those men care for the Hart Foundation, but it is also obvious that they can’t stand each other.  Somehow they were able to get a win last week, but how can they co-exist again this week after what happened?’

JOE – ‘I don’t know Mike, but I smell a set up.  Both men want that shot at the SSW Genesis title.’

MIKE – ‘That is not all that we have going on tonight folks.  We are also going to determine the No. 1 contenders for the tag titles as the Gods of Gravity and the Motor City Machine Guns face off in a 2 out of 3 falls match!  For those of you that logged on to shootingstars.com this week, you know that Shane McMahon has teased a major announcement concerning the title picture here in SSW.  Hopefully we’ll find out more tonight . . .’

*Here Comes the Moneeeeeeeyyyyyyyyyyyyy plays and Commissioner Shane MacMahon comes out*

JOE – ‘Looks like we are going to find out right now Mike.  Here comes the boss!’

Shane plays to the crowd a bit before talking

SHANE – ‘OK guys.  We at SSW have been striving to give you the best product on the market today.  SSW is the future of this business.  We are, as we say around here, the next chapter.  So it's time for something different.  I was looking at some of the talent we have here in Shooting Stars, and we have such a variety.  We have high fliers, mat technicians, and brawlers.  We see the influence of Lucha Libre, Puroresu, Greco Roman, and MMA.  We have lightweights and heavyweights.  We have a tag team scene that gets better every day.  Now, it's time to add a little something to that.  To do this, we are going to reach in the past just a bit.  I have been in meetings with ECW president Paul Heyman, and after some negotiations and a nice chunk of change on my part, I am pleased to announce that Shooting Stars Wrestling has purchased all the rights to the Pure title.’

*Shane opens his jacket to reveal the brand new SSW title belt, which gets a pop from the crowd. Shane removes the belt and throws it over his shoulder*

SHANE – ‘Now, in the coming weeks, we are going to crown the first ever SSW Pure champion. You may be wondering what the rules surrounding the Pure title are. Well, it goes like this.

1. Each wrestler has three rope breaks to stop submission holds and pinfalls during the match. After a wrestler exhausts his rope breaks, submission and pin attempts under the ropes by the opponent are considered legal.  
2. There are no closed-fist punches to the face allowed in a Pure match, only open-handed slaps or chops to the face are allowed. Punches to other parts of the body (save for low-blows) are permitted. The first use of a closed fist will get a warning, and the second will cause the wrestler to be penalized a rope break. If he is already out of rope breaks, he will be disqualified.  
3. A wrestler is subject to a twenty count by the referee if the wrestler goes to the floor.  In the event of a DQ or count out, the title will change hands.  

We are looking forward to this exciting new division and continue to set ourselves apart from the other promotions. Thank you for coming, and enjoy the show!’

-- commercial break --

In the Back, Joel Gertner gets a word with ‘The Shooter’ Brent Albright.  Albright talks about how he is a 7-time national amateur freestyle champion, and he has developed the most dreaded submission hold in SSW, the Crowbar.  He is not a performer . . . he is a WRESTLER!!!!  So he is throwing his name in the hat to be the first man to enter the Pure Wrestling tournament.  And as far as Lance Storm goes, he wants to get in his business but all he is going to be is a stepping stone.  When you stand in the way of the Shooter, you only ever have 2 choices, and that is  . . . get out, or tap out!

Back in the arena, ‘War Machine’ by Kiss blares through the speakers as Taz stalks out from behind the curtain with his signature trademark towel draped over his head.  Taz makes his way out to the ring, snatching the microphone from the ring announcer before he can finish.  

TAZ – ‘Shut that music!  So here I am again out here without an opponent.  Shane McMahon, I told you last time that you could get the biggest, you could get the baddest, and I would choke them all out!  I am out here in the ring waiting, so bring the next goof out because all he is going to be is JUST ANOTHER VICTIM!  Because I’m Taz, the Human Suplex Machine!  Beat me if you can . . . SURVIVE IF I LET YOU!’

Taz 
Weight: 240 lbs
Hometown: Red Hook Section, Brooklyn, NY
Music: "War Machine" by KISS
Finisher: katahajime (Taz-mission)

Vs

Snitszky
Weight: 350 lbs
Hometown: Allentown, PA
Music: ‘It wasn’t my fault’ WWE theme
Finisher: Pump-handle slam

Snitsky gets in the ring and he and Taz get nose to nose.  Taz backs up and points to his chin, daring Snitsky to hit him.  He does, and he unloads with a series of shots that rock Taz.  He whips him off and goes for a big boot, but Taz ducks and then levels him with the ‘Angry Man’s Clothesline’.  Before Snitsky can get up, Taz comes off and blasts him in the head with the Brooklyn Boot.  Taz mounts Snitsky and delivers vicious cross-face shots to him, then drops him on his head with a german suplex!  Taz measures Snitsky and then T-Bone suplexes him into the corner!!!!  The fans are chanting for Taz as he gives the cutthroat sign, then jumps on Snitsky’s back and locks on the Taz-mission.  Snitsky quickly taps out!

Here is your winner . . . ‘The Human Suplex Machine’, Taz!!!!

-- commercial break --

John Cena & CM Punk
Weight: 480 lbs
Hometown: West Newbury, MA/ Chicago, IL
Music: ‘Basic Thug-a-nomics’ by John Cena/ ‘Miseria Cantere: The Beginning’ by AFI
Finisher: F-U/ Anaconda Vice

Vs.

The Hart Foundation (Owen Hart & Lance Storm)
Weight: 455 lbs
Hometown: Calgary, Alberta Canada
Music: Hart Foundation theme
Finisher: Canadian Maple Leaf/ Sharpshooter

Just like last week, Cena and Punk can’t get along.  They argue over who is going to start the match, but then when Cena starts off Punk tags himself in with a hard slap to the back before the action can get underway.  Punk has Harry off-balance with combination of moves and counters, but then Cena tag himself in by slapping Punk hard on the back.  Eventually, the teamwork of the Harts prevails and they are able to isolate Punk on their side of the ring.  Punk takes a beating but manages to hit an enziguri and buy himself some time.  However, he goes to make the tag to Cena but then refuses to do it and stays in the match.  Harry catches him in the running powerslam, but Cena breaks it up and all 4 men are in the ring.  Cena hits the fisherman suplex on Teddy and then does ‘YOU CAN’T SEE ME’, but as he goes for the 5 knuckle shuffle he gets nailed accidentally by Punk, who was aiming for Smith.  Cena thinks that Punk did it on purpose, and he scoops him up and plants him with the F-U!!!!  Teddy is up top and he flies off with the Hart Attack 2.0 (Shooting Star Elbow) and gets the pinfall on Punk!!!!

Ladies and gentlemen, your winners . . . the Hart Foundation

Cena has already left the ringside area, but Punk gets on the mic and calls him out, demanding he return to the ring.  Cena doesn’t have to be told twice and he hits the ring, spearing Punk to the ground and unleashing right hands.  Punk fights back, and the two brawl all over the arena as we go to a commercial break.  

A video airs announcing that the SSW is going to cross the border into Canada in 3 weeks.  That week’s TV show will air live from Windsor, Ontario Canada for the ‘Border City Brawl’.    

-- commercial break --

Before the next match, Joe and Mike put over SSW’S first trip to the Great White North when they will broadcast live from Windsor, Ontario in 3 weeks.  Aaron ‘The Idol’ Stevens and Beth Phoenix come out to the announce table.  They crawl on top of the table and start making out, and Idol takes a mic.  He says the Idol is out there because all the ladies want to see him, and he hasn’t gotten enough TV time lately.  If Shane McMahon would read his e-mail, he would see that his inbox is flooded with mail wanting to see the Idol.  He and Beth are just going to hang out and enjoy the next match.    

Super Dragon
weight: 200 lbs
hometown: Los Angeles, CA
music: "Seek and Destroy"- Metallica
finisher: Psycho Driver 2000

vs

Chavo Geurrero Jr.
weight: 210 lbs
hometown: El Paso Texas
music: ‘Ooooh Chavo’ WWE theme
finisher: Gory Bomb, Frog Splash

Dragon attacks Chavo before the bell rings, and he has no chance to get in any offense.  Chavo finally fights back and hits the 3 amigos on Dragon, but as he climbs up to the top for the frog splash, Dragon catches him in a wheel kick that sends him falling all the way to the mat!  Dragon unleashes a ‘Violence Party’ on Chavo, busting him open above his right eye.  Dragon catches Chavo on his shoulders and hits the Psycho Driver!!!!  Chavo is out and Dragon makes the cover, but he pulls Chavo up at 2!  Dragon ties him up and then hits 2 vicious double stomps before pinning Chavo for the 3 count!

Here is your winner . . . Super Dragon!

After the match, Dragon looks into the camera and tells Jushin ‘Thunder’ Liger that he is coming for the Light Heavyweight title.  He makes the belt sign around his waist as he walks off, passing Idol and Beth who keep their distance while applauding for Super Dragon.  

Idol grabs the mic again and gets in the ring, takes credit for running Roderick Strong out of SSW but for weeks he has heard about this new guy that is supposed to be coming in to take his place.  Still he hasn’t seen anyone.  But onto more important matters at hand, the Idol sees people like CM Punk and John Cena challenging for the SSW Genesis title, but why is the Idol not getting his title shot?   He and Beth are the most dominant couple in wrestling.  He is going to be SSW champion and soon Beth is going to be the women’s champion.  Suddenly ‘FUEL’ by Metallica hits and out comes Frankie Kazarian!  Kaz comes out and gets in Idol’s face, and he says that he is the man that Strong was talking about.  Idol attacks Kaz, but he fights him off.  Beth tries to get a cheap shot in on Kaz, but he blocks it and then plants a big kiss on her!!!!  Idol tries to come at him from behind, but Kaz dodges and Idol and Beth collide.  Kaz is left standing tall while Idol and Beth head for higher ground.  

-- commercial break --

Jimmy Hart, Owen Hart, and the rest of the Hart Foundation are backstage.  Owen talks about how it is going to be a homecoming for the Hart Foundation in 3 weeks.  He puts over Canada as being the greatest country in the world with the greatest fans, then says that the fans in Canada are appreciative of great athletes like the Hart Foundation.  Unlike America, where they cheer thugs like John Cena and degenerates like CM Punk.  

Gods of Gravity (Paul London & Brian Kendrick)
Weight: 385 lbs
Hometown: Olympia, Washington and Austin, Texas
Music: Danger: High Voltage by Electric 6
Finisher: London Calling (shooting star press) & Sliced Bread # 2

Vs

Motor City Machine Guns (Alex Shelley & Chris Sabin)
Weight: 400 lbs
Hometown: Detroit, Michigan
Music: ‘6 Barrell Shotgun’ by Black Rebel Motorcycle Club
Finisher: Shellshock, Cradle Shock

The action is furious during the opening moments of this one, as Shelley and London exchange a flurry of holds and reversals.  London gets the better of the exchange and takes Shelley down with a swinging headscissors, then Kendrick and London double-team Shelley.  Their tactics are almost heel-like, which gets a few boos from the crowd.  Shelley fights back, and it seems that the fans are getting behind the Guns a little bit.  Shelley akes the hot tag to Sabin, who just goes off on London and Kendrick.  Sabin tosses Kendrick into the corner and hits a running yakuza kick.  He and Shelley sit London on the top rope and hit a double-team enziguri and spin kick, then they tie him to the tree of woe.  Shelley gets on all fours and Sabin hits a delayed dropkick to the face!!!!  Kendrick is back in and he hits a huricanrana on Sabin, taking him all the way to the outside.  Kendrick and London try to double-team Shelley, but he hits a low blow on Kendrick and rolls him up.  Sabin grabs London’s leg and pulls him outside.  Shelley puts his feet on the ropes for extra leverage, and the ref counts 3!!!!

Your winner of the 1st fall . . . The Motor City Machine Guns!

-- commercial break --

Back from break, we are underway with the 2nd fall.  This time, it is the Guns that are doing the double-teaming on Kendrick.  Kendrick takes a beating, but get the hot tag and London comes in with drop-saults for everyone.  Kendrick hits the ‘Sliced Bread # 2’ on Sabin, while London follows it up with a standing shooting star press.  Shelley is in just in time to break up the pin, and all four men are going at it.  The next several moments is full of high spots and false-finishes, with each man hitting his finisher only to have it broken up before the 3 count.  It ends up being Shelley and London in the ring, and London nails a heel-kick enziguri followed by a double chickenwing into a facebuster.  He climbs the ropes and flies off with the shooting star press, but Sabin reaches in the ring and pulls Shelley out of the way.  London crashes hard to the mat, and Shelley nails him with a superkick followed by a spin kick to the gut by Sabin and then a simultaneous enziguri + super kick by both of them!  Sabin hooks London’s leg while Shelley hits a suicide dive on Kendrick that takes both of them out, and the ref counts the 3 count.

Your winners, in 2 straight falls . . . and No. 1 contenders to the SSW tag titles . . . The Motor City Machine Guns!

Before the ref can even raise Shelley and Sabin’s hands, the tag champions Deuce & Domino hit the ring.  They lay out everyone with the tag belts, then hit the ‘Crack Em in the Mouth’ on Sabin and London.  Both the GOG and the Guns are left laying as Deuce & Domino hold up the tag title belts as the show ends.